Lonely Only

Today was a wonderful beach day for our family to celebrate my husband’s birthday. We found a giant rock to camp out on that was perfect for our picnic lunch. After we ate, I read a book, took a little nap and chatted with my husband. I watched my son, who was busy engaging in the fine art of “people watching.” It suddenly struck me that maybe he leads a bit of a lonely life with no siblings to hang out with.

This year he hit the magical age of 13 and became a teenager. (Sigh.) We have started letting him go hang out with friends without our supervision — just baseball at the park, but still a big step for us. I have four wonderful sisters who are, and have always been, my best friends. My husband has two sisters, but he tended to hang out more with the male cousins.

My son? He has lots of friends, but we have always been his best friends! He has cousins, but they are all lots older than him. Is he a “lonely only”? Sometimes I think the answer must be “Yes.” Unfortunately it wasn’t by choice, as we tried to give him lots of siblings. By God’s grace, we will be meeting the four of them in the air on that great day when Jesus comes! As for now, though, we are a happy family of three, and a homeschool with just one student.

The beach isn’t the only place that causes me to reflect on life’s journey. Last Sunday it was a 30-mile bike ride! All of the sudden it hit me: the star student of our homeschool is going to be in seventh grade! Seventh grade…how did he get there? And just as suddenly, I was filled with such a sense of accomplishment. I did it! I somehow taught him things he needs to know, like how to read and the multiplication facts and hopefully a few other things. Even when it felt like I was failing or overwhelmed, the learning still happened. We have survived seven years of “school,” and even though it went by way too fast, I’m so proud of him, so proud of us! And, I’m thankful that God has blessed us so.

We think that he will probably attend academy starting in ninth grade. I’m not sure what my life will be like when I am no longer the official teacher. Lonely, I guess.

Sometimes I hear of those homeschool families that have a multitude of children. I have to admit I’m jealous. They get extra years of child raising and, oh, the fun of a crazy, full house. Sometimes, though, I just look at my one special blessing of my son and I think, “I’m so lucky, I’ve been able to just concentrate on him, to enjoy every minute.”

I hope that you, dear reader, have enjoyed God’s blessing to “be fruitful and multiply.” I hope you are enjoying every child in your homeschool. As for me and my house, we only have one, but our quiver is full!

I am married to Freddie, my knight in (not always so) shiny armor, and have a wonderful son, Bruno, the light of my life! We love homeschooling and spending lots of time together. I also like to read, sew, do jigsaw puzzles, and hike. I was born and raised in Iowa, the last of five girls, but moved to Boston and have grown fond of the ocean. I teach the Junior Class at church and lead Pathfinders. I enjoy writing for the blog.


  1. Beautiful post! God has blessed you with an extra closeness with your son–something you may not have had otherwise! We had just our son for eleven years, so I understand a lot of your experience. We have also lost a pregnancy, and have hope to someday be raising that child in heaven! When our son was eleven, God blessed us with a daughter. With that many years between them, I feel like we have two “lonely onlys!” But no matter, God has blessed us with very close relationships with each of our children! May God continue to bless your family as you guide and raise your son for Him!


  2. I have been extremely blessed! I have had the best of both worlds! First my husband and I raised four children and homeschooled all of them. I loved seeing them interact with each other. They always had built in playmates. When our youngest was 11 1/2, we had another child. Not planned, but I guess God knew what he was doing! She is now 13 and I am loving our homeschool of one! Not many get to see BOTH worlds, and I am enjoying every minute!


  3. Kathy, I saw your post on here, and am thrilled to hear you are all doing well. Mitch (the fellow Iowan) and I gratefully remember your hospitality and friendship when we lived in Massachusetts at Camp Winnekeag, and I cannot believe that Bruno is already a teenager! It is great to hear that your homeschool journey has gone so well. Praise God! 🙂
    Emily Graham


  4. Thank you for sharing as I also am raising only one child, our beautiful, smart, strong-willed, adopted daughter! I understand your feelings of wishing for more kids and have also lost one pregnancy before adopting. Thanks for the positive outlook and encouragement to make the best of the family we do have! Although my daughter longs for a sister or even a brother, we do not know if it’s Gods plan. We will enjoy each moment right now for that is most precious. #homeschoolingjustoneinCA.


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